Memoirs Of A Geisha (2006)
"A decent and beautiful film crippled by bad casting and non-native speakers forced to use English."

Lady Vengeance (2005)
"The latest film from Park Chan-wook is the final part of his revenge trilogy and is another cracking film, though less about the vengeance and more about the Jeunet."

A Bittersweet Life (2005)
"A promising revenge thriller ruined by misplaced comedy"

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (2005)
"The best film of 2005 is almost certainly The Constant Gardner, but for a film just as good, in a far different and less serious way, check out Kiss Kiss Bang Bang."

Left For Dead : UK Action Film
"Can a British crew make an action film with Hong Kong sensibilities? Watch Left for Dead and you'll see."

Unleashed (2005)
"Perseverence does pay off, as Jet Li finally makes a decent Hollywood film. In fact, so good it's up there with the mighty Fist Of Legend"

The Interpreter (2005)
"A decent thriller, featuring excellent performances from Nicole Kidman and Sean Penn, but let down by a lacklustre ending."

Primer (2004)
"Excellent time travel debut from American auteur."

The Purifiers (2004)
"A low-budget Scottish kung fu film, with boring fights, bad acting and a fight in the dark involving blue glowsticks."

2046 (2004)
"Wong Kar Wai's follow up to In The Mood For Love isn't quite as accomplished, but still cements his reputation as the master of conveying mood and emotion via celluloid"

House of Flying Daggers (2004)
"Yimou's second wuxia epic is a disappointing tragedy dressed up as unintentional farce."

Series 7: The Contenders (2001)
"A violent and hilarious satire on reality TV. Not be confused with The Running Man."

Oldboy (2003)
"Chan-wook Park's ultraviolent revenge tale shits all over Kill Bill from a great height."

Hero (2002)
"Zhang Yimou moves from arthouse to martial arts with a gorgeous film about the making of China"

Versus (2000)
"Bloody but surprisingly dull Japanese zombie flick."

Casshern (2004)
"A mind-blowing SF visual feast"

My Sassy Girl (2001)
"The best romantic comedy since Amelie"

Hellboy (2004)
"Guillermo Del Toro's adaptation of Mike Mignola's anti-hero is decent but could have done with a bigger budget and more interesting action."

Kill Bill 2 (2004)
"Quentin Tarantino concludes the Kill Bill story with a turgid film that should have been about two hours shorter and a lot less painful to endure."

Last Life In The Universe (2003)
"Another slow, romance set against the backdrop of an Asian metropolis; a Thai Lost In Translation if you will."

Infernal Affairs 2 (2003)
"Infernal Affairs was an intelligent, thought-provoking, suspense-laden thriller, but sadly its prequel is none of these."

Zatoichi (2003)
"An excellent samurai action film"

Eternal Sunshine For The Spotless Mind (2004)
"A brilliant, unsentimental romantic comedy."

Underworld
"Vampire Movie starring Kate Beckinsale"

Blow Up
"A film by Michelangelo Antonioni starring David Hemmings and Vanessa Redgrave."

Elephant - Gus van Sant, 2003
"Gus van Sant's output is almost unique amongst directors - somehow he manages to slip from the decidedly left-field films (My Own Private Idaho, his frame-by-frame remake of Psycho) into big "Hollywood" films (Good Will Hunting) and back again without any problem. Along the way, he's also directed well acclaimed middle-ground films such as To Die For, shot music videos and become a published author."

Lost In Translation
"Sofia Coppola's second effort is a slow and dreamy romance film set against the backdrop of Tokyo."

Robot Stories
"A collection of four SF tales that uses robots to explore some "deep shit" about humans."

2009: Lost Memories
"Alternate history is rarely used as the basis for films, much less in violent action films, but in 2009: Lost Memories, a Korean and Japanese co-production, the new timeline is original and well conceived."

Luminal (2003)
"A Continental art house film so stereotypically pretentious it is almost self-parody."

Interstellar 5555
"As a concept, the premise for Interstellar 5555 sounds distinctly more 70's prog-rock than 21st century. Making an hour long animated film, soundtracked entirely by your music (no dialogue at all) would probably be the sort of thing you'd expect from 'Tales from the Topographic Oceans'-era Yes. It's not, perhaps, an idea you'd expect from French electronic dance act Daft Punk. And yet, in association with Toei animation, that's precisely what they've done. The film, made over 28 months of intensive work, is backed by music from the Discovery Album (2002). If you've seen any of the videos for the singles from that album, you've already seen parts of the Interstellar 5555."

Cypher - A second review.
"This is the latest film by Vincenzo Natali, who was the director of the low budget cult hit Cube. Indeed, in some ways it carries the theme of paranoia from that film over with it. However, the shadowy agency in Cypher isn't governmental, but corporate. Two huge firms dominate the story, and are locked in a war of subterfuge and escalating espionage."

Battle Royale II: Requiem (2003)
"Sloppy sequel to the excellent Battle Royale"

Cypher (2002)
"Natali's follow up to Cube doesn't go anywhere."

A Mighty Wind
"Christopher Guest et al continue to amuse . . ."

Incubus - film review
"How can a black and white film starring William Shatner and filmed entirely in Esperanto be bad? This cult classic horror can't be beaten."

Strange Days (1995)
"Impressive character based science fiction"

A.I. (2001)
"Spielberg disengages his brain and produces an incoherent mess."

Avalon (2000)
"Japanese/Polish virtual reality strangeness"

Spirited Away
"Dream-like, mysterious, almost incomprehensible... but a joy to watch."

Insomnia (American)
"The original is one of my all-time favourites...the remake's pretty good too!"

Screamers (1995)
"Fatally undermined Philip K Dick adaption"

The Thirteenth Floor (1999)
"An attractive, empty sf noir failure."

The Sum Of All Fears
"Putting a happy face on the CIA!"

The Cell (2000)
"An excellent blend of virtual reality and serial killer tropes"

Supernova (2000)
"A confused, contradictory space adventure."

Cube (1997)
"Finally an intelligent low budget sf film"

eXistenZ (1999)
"David Cronenberg's typically gooey take on virtual reality"

Planet Of The Apes (2001)
"It really is a shame to see a film featuring chimps in spacesuits go so horribly wrong."

The Fellowship Of The Ring (2001)
"The first part of Peter Jackson's adaption of Lord Of The Rings"

Memento
"A truly brilliant film - clever, innovative, thrilling, funny and moving..."

Movie Review: Planet Of The Apes
"A pleasant waste of two hours..."

Concepts in dating movies
"The Virgin Suicides as a dating movie"

The Virgin Suicides DVD
"Getting paid to watch movies is ok. This is about to be printed in What DVD. Girly? Oh yeah, says The Bear."

The Deer Hunter DVD
"This is this? Maybe, says The Bear"

Network
"Directed by Sidney Lumet, written by Paddy Chayefsky, and released in 1976, 'Network' brilliantly satirises the shrieking emptiness of the world of nationally syndicated television."

Mission: Impossible 2
"Tom Cruise has wavey hair"

Billy Elliot
"You'll Laugh. You'll Cry. You Might Even Hurl."

The Iron Giant
"Instant Must-See Classic"

Shrek
"Mike Myers reprises his Scottish accent"

SwordFish
"John Travolta with silly hair"

Moulin Rouge
"Ewan McGregor and Nicole Kidman cavort in Bohemian Paris"

Tomb Raider
"Angelina Jolie has a fine pair of ears."

Movie Review: Deep Rising
"Gang of well-armed good mercenaries end up in a face-off with gang of well-armed bad mercenaries on a cruise ship which has been totalled by a huge, dubiously-rendered monster..."

Unbreakable
"***1/2 out of *****"

DVD Review: Proof Of Life
"Erm...a review...of the DVD...of the film "Proof Of Life"...any questions?"

Movie Review: Sexy Beast
"Just what it says, actually."